The Absentee by Maria Edgeworth - A complete eBook in pages (102 / 300)

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The Absentee by Maria Edgeworth
Book, page 102 / 300

on my lord and the gentlemen to sleep, as there was no moon.'

The dinner had two great faults--profusion and pretension. There
was, in fact, ten times more on the table than was necessary; and
the entertainment was far above the circumstances of the person
by whom it was given; for instance, the dish of fish at the head
of the table had been brought across the island from Sligo, and
had cost five guineas; as the lady of the house failed not to
make known. But, after all, things were not of a piece; there
was a disparity between the entertainment and the attendants;
there was no proportion or fitness of things--a painful endeavour
at what could not be attained, and a toiling in vain to conceal
and repair deficiencies and blunders. Had the mistress of the
house been quiet; had she, as Mrs. Broadhurst would say, but let
things alone, let things take their course, all would have passed
off with well-bred people; but she was incessantly apologising,
and fussing, and fretting inwardly and outwardly, and directing
and calling to her servants--striving to make a butler who was
deaf, a boy who was hare-brained, do the business of five
accomplished footmen of PARTS and FIGURE. The mistress of the
house called for 'plates, clean plates!-hot plates!'

'But none did come, when she did call for them.'

Mrs. Raffarty called 'Larry! Larry! My lord's plate, there!
--James! bread to Captain Bowles!--James! port wine to the
major!--James! James Kenny! James!'

'And panting James toiled after her in vain.'

At length one course was fairly got through, and after a
torturing half-hour, the second course appeared, and James Kenny
was intent upon one thing, and Larry upon another, so that the
wine-sauce for the hare was spilt by their collision; but, what
was worse, there seemed little chance that the whole of this
second course should ever be placed altogether rightly upon the
table. Mrs. Raffarty cleared her throat, and nodded, and
pointed, and sighed, and set Larry after Kenny, and Kenny after
Larry; for what one did, the other undid; and at last the lady's
anger kindled, and she spoke:

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